Wednesday, April 30, 2014

How Much Longer Will We Look the Other Way?



So, let me get this straight.

Donald Sterling, the 80-year-old owner of the L.A. Clippers, happens to be recorded (How convenient…?) as he tells his “girlfriend” that he really wishes that she wouldn’t be photographed with black people or bring them to Clippers games.

And when this highly-contrived and conveniently recorded (By the way, who put her up to that…?) conversation is leaked to the media, we, the public, feign surprise that there are people – yes, even high profile people – in the world who harbor and espouse racist beliefs.

Well, please allow me to make an observation: Racists do live among us. And, if I might, please allow me to make one more: The racists who live among us come in all colors, all shapes, all sizes, all ages. We can find them in any walk of life; they may pursue any vocation, live in any neighborhood, or claim to be adherents of any faith. They may be pillars of the community, yes, even wealthy 80-year-old basketball team owners who have received awards for their contributions to the community.

Of course, some may argue, in hindsight, that allegations of Sterling’s discrimination in his property leasing business should have been a clue to his true disposition. But those allegations didn’t spur us to ask questions or urge him to change any of his business practices.  We simply looked the other way.

Too often, we all simply ignore the behavior of those who harbor intolerant attitudes. We shrug at unsavory comments, or smile uncomfortably at tasteless jokes. We fail to speak up when we see blatant acts of discrimination. We continue to patronize business establishments that have lengthy histories of discriminatory practices.

Many years ago, I went to one of Memphis’ iconic barbeque restaurants with a date. We arrived, were seated, and waited for one of the servers to take our order.

We waited, and waited.

And we couldn’t help noticing that folks at all of the tables around us were being warmly greeted by the restaurant’s servers, served promptly, and given great attention….all while we waited for someone to even take our order.  When a rude server finally brought our meal to the table, our barbeque was cold.

Now, in case you might be wondering, my date from all those years ago is black, as am I. The servers in question? They were all black, too. But all of the folks seated around us that evening were all white.

The experience left a bad enough taste in my mouth (no pun intended) that I avoided this particular restaurant for quite some time – years, in fact. The next time that I was there, I happened to be with a mixed-race group of co-workers from my office. And our service couldn’t have been better, our server couldn’t have been chattier, and our food couldn’t have been tastier.

But when my husband and I gave the place a try a few years later, we discovered that nothing had changed from my first experience there. Our service was slow, our server was rude, our food was cold, and others around us were receiving far better service. And we gave the place another chance, just in the past few years, just to see if we had, by chance, previously happened in on a bad evening. No such luck.  I have no plans to return.

The point of this story is simple: When the business principles of a particular establishment offended me, I made a decision that I wouldn’t continue to patronize the establishment. Now, granted, this establishment doesn’t seem to have missed my patronage; it continues to be a thriving place. But I will choose only to support businesses that treat me and others with respect.

If Donald Sterling’s business practices offended us all that way – if players wouldn’t play for him, if coaches wouldn’t coach for him, if fans chose to spend their entertainment dollars with that other L.A. team – it might well be that Donald Sterling would have been out of the business of basketball already, without any further encouragement.

But his behavior hasn’t offended us that way. And it's almost as if we secretly hope that someone like NBA Commissioner Adam Silver will come along and do what we don’t have the collective fortitude to do – even if (and I do question this…) Silver’s proposed punishment may not be legal.

The Adam Silvers of the world cannot save us from ourselves. If we truly want to bring about change, we must stop looking the other way. We all must be willing to acknowledge acts of racism and intolerance when we see them, speak up in support of those who are being oppressed, reprove in love our brothers and sisters who fail to love all of God’s people, and, yes, refuse to support business establishments and institutions whose leaders fail to respect the dignity of every human being.

One of the best commentaries that I’ve seen on this sad tale was written by retired basketball-great Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, who ends his eloquent writing with these words: “Instead of being content to punish Sterling and go back to sleep, we need to be inspired to vigilantly seek out, expose, and eliminate racism at its first signs.”

Thank you, Kareem. I couldn’t have said it better myself.